Learning how to effectively discipline the child is an important skill that all parents need to learn. Discipline is not same as the punishment. Instead, discipline has to do more with the teaching, and involves teaching your child right from wrong, how to respect rights of others, which behaviors are acceptable and which are not, with goal of helping to develop child who feels secure and loved, is self-confident, self-disciplined and knows how to control his impulses, and who does not get overly frustrated with normal stresses of everyday life.
Important Reminders about Discipline: If you are having difficulty disciplining the child, it is important to remember that you may not be doing anything wrong. All children are different and have different temperament and developmental level and style of discipline that may work with other children may not work with your.
You should understand that how you behave when disciplining your child will help to determine how your child is going to behave or misbehave in future. If you give in after your child repeatedly argues, becomes violent or has temper tantrum, then he will learn to repeat this behavior because he knows you may eventually give in. If you are firm and consistent then he will learn that it does not pay to fight doing what he is eventually going to have to do anyway. Some children, however, will feel like they won if they put off doing something that they did not want to do for even few minutes.
Be consistent in your method of discipline and how you punish child. It is normal for the children to test their limit, and if you are inconsistent in what these limits are, then you will be encouraging more misbehavior.
· Stay calm and don’t get carried away when your child misbehaves. Avoid yelling and screaming, since this can teach the child that it is all right to lose control if you do not get your way. If you feel like things are escalating too much, then take break until you can regain your composure.
· Avoid doing too much criticism. Make sure the child understands that it is misbehavior that you are unhappy with and that you will always love him.
· Avoid doing too much praise. You do not need to be continuously praising child, especially for routine activities, because it will make comments less effective.
· Do not focus on negatives all of time, especially when offering positive reinforcement.
· Avoid doing physical punishment. Spanking has never been shown to be more effective than other form of punishment and will make the child more aggressive and angry.
· Remember to give the rewards and praise for good behavior.
· Understand difference between rewards and bribes. A reward is something child receives after he has done something, while bribe is given beforehand, to try and motivate the child to do what you want. Try to avoid Bribes
· Be a role model.
· Most importantly, provide the child with safe environment in which he feel secure and loved.